Private Perfection

Precisely because I am generally (and not particularly) in love, I think about love. And humanity. Nothing philosophical to brag about-my thoughts are always random, pretty much like hitting the improbability drive before the morning coffee. So if I give my heart to you/I must be sure from the very start/that you would love me more than her...

Well, here's my two cents: what we love about someone is his/her humanity. I do not talk about infatuation or self-marketing, I talk about this kinda feeling that makes you find a comfort zone that you wouldn't abandon. It goes like this: the most painful break-ups are those where your 'checklist' was bigger -for guys the 'bigger' sometimes starts with 'boobs'-. What I mean is that sometimes you find someone 'perfect' for you, not for the universe. His smile, her free-time, his family, her hobbies, his head for foreign languages... And then your 'awesome' list grows and grows without you noticing that you are even starting to love what you cannot stand in anyone else.

Loving the other's humanity is aching with the possibility of not having his/her imperfections around anymore. That's how I found out how hopeless in love I was with a friend. It takes two seconds: in one you realise you are afraid to lose him; during the second you get truly annoyed to figure out life without that hysterical bundle of feelings won't feel the same.

So that's how love starts: with a mix of fear and annoyance. Oh what a night...