The i-Con

Absolutely back from Ukraine. I say absolutely because the impressions, the collected (and collective) moments, the wedding, the thoughts that stalked my brain in the numerous air connections... were a whirlwind that left me speechless for a couple of days. How does memory work? People nearby me know that I just cannot remember entire years and that I manage to confuse myself quite often. But ever since the day when I walked Saint Sofia's church my head has been full of weird stuff, such as the feel of my dad's hugs, the taste of the asparagus soup my grandma made, the colour of a bug my ex decided to call 'el bugo', and very surprisingly, the shape of the nose of the Benji-guy I met the other day when there was only a dim light from my hall on the background. And there they were a lot of icons. No wonder, Russian Orthodox, Ukranian Orthodox, Byzantine... the power of the image has been a thing to consider for a long time.

While looking at the 'images' of all these people I was thinking how relevant it might have been to have them all represented; that meant other generations would always remember them. How do we collect icons now? Tabloids? Nobel Prize? The V.F.'s Best Dressed List? I do think they are way too temporal, but all of them aim to persistence of the memory, to leave a mark, to let the world remember. And in our little lives we do strive for transcendence as well. Just as Naoko said to the guy in 'Norwegian Wood' - 'don't forget me'... we make it a demand, a silent scream, a day-to-day fight. But a change of scenery can change the whole perception of things and take the people to be part of the background.

Sometimes I wish I knew my icon. I would like to be in the head of Mike for three minutes and see what will be left when I leave this country. How do you store each smile, each talk, each laugh, each kiss, each walk holding hands and overall, each time we did not speak 'about it' so one day you can warm your hands on the bonfire of the burnt love? Guess he'll put all in his pocket and save it for a rainy day.